still

i can’t believe i’m still sick.

i actually felt a lot better last Sunday and then something snapped loose Wednesday and all of a sudden i felt 100x worse.

this weekend was miserable.  i don’t remember the last time i had been this run into the ground by an illness. 

every time i find myself this sick i start bartering with the devil.  i will do anything to feel better again.  i do dumb things like drink more emergen-c than i believe is recommended.  vitamins on an empty stomach.  tea with cayenne pepper.  anything to feel remotely human again.

even though i know the only way is to ride it out.  i can only think about how glorious that day will be when i can breathe through both nostrils.

i find myself most sad by the fact that i can no longer taste anything. my connection to food as a comfort source has been tested. i should take this opportunity to eat raw kale and all sorts of healthy things while i’m in this state.

school starts tonight and while i wished i felt better i’m excited to see peoples and go to class.  i’m hoping tonight is low key orientation type stuff because i don’t know how much i can really handle.

i can’t wait until this sickness is over. 

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