pork chop

i found myself sitting at a peet’s coffee this morning drinking a lackluster soy latte and reading tao lin’s bed wishing it was better.  or at least not so desperate.  i was so close to finishing the book and i had to stop or i was bound to walk into the office on my first day of work full of warped emotional distress.  every character in the story i was in the middle of was either listless to the point of catatonic or dripping with so much need, so much want that i couldn’t take it.  couple this with some leonard cohen and buckets of rain and i was ripe to burst.

i’ve since put bed to bed.  i’m supposed to mail it to inna but i don’t think she’ll want it.

after nanowrimo, the only fiction i’ve read that has not failed me has been vonnegut.  i think i’m going to go back to nonfiction for awhile.  at least until my brain resets from tao lin trauma. i take my tiny eraser and i make it go away.

work was good.  the first day jitters dissipated once i got to lose myself in new tasks and projects.  it felt good to start training and realize i know what i’m doing.  this job is not as foreign to me as some have been in the past.

i did end up staying late and walked through the front door completely starving.  you really shouldn’t wait 7 hours between meals.  a snack drawer is in order right quick because i came home, cooked and ate entirely too much food too fast because of insane hunger.

and now how i bloat.

i sat in the office kitchen alone this afternoon to eat lunch.  too many hand slappings at higgins for eating at my desk and i’ve subconsciously trained myself to sit in the break room even though everyone else merrily ate sandwiches and the like at their computers.  i remember managing to eat a pork chop out of my desk drawer at higgins without getting caught by hr.  oh, those were the days.

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2 Responses to “pork chop”


  1. 1 steve roggenbuck January 23, 2010 at 7:39 pm

    i am reading ‘bed’ also, sometimes, and haven’t been very encouraged by it. i think it is not as good as tao lin’s other books that i have read. he has a lot of bad similes in ‘bed,’ i think. i think ‘what?’ when i am reading it. i like the general style that he has seemd to develop more since then


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