Hi. I am sleepy. I am relishing in my dysfunction. Listen to The Mountain Goats “How To Embrace A Swamp Creature” and know how I feel.

It’s funny how I work myself into a frenzy and after I pop I manage to sit and play bejeweled for 4 hours straight in my smelly gym clothes without an inkling that there is a world outside of my computer screen.

This was what had happened last night after combing through Craigslist and various other job sites friends had sent me. With each job post I read I saw a future of business casualness and awful footwear. The whole thing made me itch, the idea of going back to an office, being chained to Microsoft Outlook and company meetings. I couldn’t take it. Jordan called to invite the dr. and I to a bbq and I replied with “I’m looking for a job!!!”

I got off the phone and that’s when I started playing video games.

I wished I owned a pinball machine.

When I finally tore myself away from the laptop it was close to midnight and I was starving. I ate an ear or corn and some vegan ice cream for dinner. I felt like a dude.

I woke up this morning with most of the crazy dissipated and I told myself that if I’ve managed to get this far without getting myself killed or horribly disfigured I can make it another day, another week, another month. Thanks Mr. Carbone. I owe you one.

After yoga I enjoyed more dudefull squalor and laid about playing more games, scratching myself and drinking beer.

Now only if I can learn how to belch appropriately and not urp so ladylike.

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